Healing – Plattsville Church

Mental Health Sundays: Myths, Lies, and Mental Health

mental_health_week_web_0_0 On Sunday we opened up a really important topic: mental health. Mental health is someone that affects huge numbers of people (estimates are around ¼ of people), yet it is one health challenge that has tremendous stigma, exclusion, and a lack of understanding surrounding it. And that’s something we want to change.

So we began by exploring some of the realities of what mental health is. We shared some basic information about three major mental health illnesses. But then to move it away from theory, and “clinical” descriptions I read the following first hand accounts from people struggling with mental health challenges.

Liz writes:

“Depression is a very emotive subject for me, especially among people who have never had to live with it. It is that hidden disability that no one really understands fully – least of all those who suffer with it. The symptoms include feeling overwhelmingly tired, angry, emotional and with a need to withdraw from the world around you. Seeking treatment can also make you feel even more depressed as you feel that you are even more of a failure at not being able to get through it on your own.”

William Styron writes in Darkness Visible:

“The pain is unrelenting, and what makes the condition intolerable is the foreknowledge that no remedy will come – not in a day, an hour, a month, or a minute. If there is mild relief, one knows that it is only temporary; more pain will follow. It is hopelessness even more than pain that crushes the soul. So the decision-making of daily life involves not, as in normal affairs, shifting from one annoying situation to another less annoying – or from discomfort to relative comfort, or from boredom to activity – but moving from pain to pain. One does not abandon, even briefly, one’s bed of nails, but is attached to it wherever one goes.”

And Miriam writes:

“As someone with a mental health illness, you get the feeling that somehow you are more difficult to deal with within the institution of the “church”. In a naïve way I believed the church would be open to all. However, my experience makes me feel that I am on the outside of the institution and an embarrassment.”

The truth is that Jesus never turned away from someone in need, so neither can the church.

So to begin this conversation I unpacked 3 myths I see in the Christian world concerning mental health, and then next week we’ll look at how to help and support those with mental health.

The three myths we unpacked were: mental health is caused by sin, mental health can be cured by prayer alone, and mental illness isn’t welcome in the church.

The truth is that we love simple and easy explanations so when it comes to mental health we often reach for those easy solutions: you must have sinned. Yet this reduction of a complex issue that involves emotions, chemical imbalances, physical realties, and social environments to just personal sin that is “God is sending consequences” is directly against the Bible. I know that sounds harsh but in John 9 when the disciples try to reduce someone’s illness to personal sin – Jesus directly confronts them and contradicts their view. So we need to contradict this myth as well.

Secondly, we looked at how mental health is still believed to be cured by prayer alone by 35% of the church. This is also incredibly unhelpful and a myth. I’m not saying I don’t believe in prayer for healing, but that with any other physical illness we not only pray but also seek medical help. But when it comes to mental health there is the myth that prayer, reading your bible, and more self-discipline will be enough. This is simply not true, not helpful, not Biblical (see my sermon on James 5 for more), and needs to be stopped. I absolutely believe that prayer can cure mental illness, I just don’t believe it is the only cure.

Thirdly, we looked at how mental illness isn’t welcome in the church. I say this is a myth not because I don’t believe it’s true, or that it doesn’t happen in churches; but that in the church as it’s meant to be this exclusion should never happen. Jesus would never exclude or isolate someone who is hurting. So if we want to follow Jesus, this idea that mental illness isn’t welcome in the church needs to go. Following Jesus requires that we welcome and include especially in this area.

So those are three myths we unpacked, along with the myth that “the church can’t make a difference” in this area, because I believe we can. I believe that if we get serious about journeying with people and supporting them. Yes professionals and health care experts are needed (see next week) but so too are caring communities of support. And that’s what the church can and should be.

Jean Vanier & John Swinton write this,

The church has a history of pioneering in health and social care and I believe it is time for us to step up to the challenge of working in the area of mental health.

So on Sunday to wrap up I gave us one main point and one challenge. The main point was: Mental health is real and we need to address it. And then the challenge to do this was simple this week: to learn more about it. To fight against the stigma, lack of awareness, and exclusion by learning and growing. This is obviously just the first step but it’s a necessary one. And next week we’ll learn how to take another step as a community.

“Give to us grace, O Father, not to pass by suffering or joy without eyes to see; give us understanding and sympathy; and guard us from selfishness that we may enter into the joys and sufferings of others; use us to gladden and strengthen those who are weak and suffering; that by our lives we may help others who believe and serve you, and project your light which is the light of life.” H.R.L. Sheppard (1880-1937)

Sermon Notes:

Big Idea: Mental health is real and we need to address it.

Teaching Points:

¼ people experience an episode of mental health challenges.
It is not okay to hold prejudice against those with mental health challenges.
Three major mental health illnesses: bipolar, major depression, dissociative identity disorder.
Myth #1: Mental Health Challenges are caused by personal sin and punishment from God.
We cannot reduce the cause of mental illness to sin.
Myth #2: Mental Health Challenges can be cured by prayer alone
I absolutely believe that prayer can cure mental illness, I just don’t believe it is the only cure.
Myth #3: Mental Health is not welcome in the church.
We believe that people struggling with anything are welcome in this place
The church is one of, if not the most important thing in combating mental illness and changing it.
The church has a history of pioneering in health and social care and I believe it is time for us to step up to the challenge of working in the area of mental health. John Swinton and Jean Vanier
The greater our understanding the greater or depth of care

Adult Discussion Questions:

What stuck out to you from the sermon? What was challenging to you? What was new? What experiences have you had in relation to mental health? Did you realize that mental health was that prevalent? Why do you think it’s important to talk about? What myths have you believed about it, or are still working through? How can you learn more about it this week?

Discussion Questions / Responses for Young Families

Today learn more about mental health. Look up on the internet for some good discussion guides to talk to your kids, and use one!

Challenge for the Week:

Learn about mental health

Podcasts, Sermon Reflections

The Book that Almost Wasn’t: Prayer, Healing and Revival – James 5

On Sunday we opened up a favourite passage of mine in James 5. In James 5:13-18 we read this:

Are any of you suffering hardships? You should pray. Are any of you happy? You should sing praises. Are any of you sick? You should call for the elders of the church to come and pray over you, anointing you with oil in the name of the Lord. Such a prayer offered in faith will heal the sick, and the Lord will make you well. And if you have committed any sins, you will be forgiven. Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results. Elijah was as human as we are, and yet when he prayed earnestly that no rain would fall, none fell for three and a half years! Then, when he prayed again, the sky sent down rain and the earth began to yield its crops.

And here James shares with us some incredibly practical advice about prayer, healing, and sickness. James calls us all to pray if we are hurting, or in joy, that prayer should be our response (verse 13). And then he gives some incredibly practical advice – if you are sick you should call in the elders.

The truth is that sickness has a tendency to isolate and to separate and James knows that in sickness we need others. So he says invite the elders in to pray, anoint, and support someone who is sick. This is because in sickness it can be so difficult at times to pray, so he says rely on the prayers of others. Be anointed a symbol of the Holy Spirit, and it was also thought to be medicinal. So pray for healing, and don’t shy away from those in the healing profession and medicine for help as well.

James says bring in supports to care, love, pray, and anoint and to find God willing to heal.

We also looked at the importance of confession, of the phrase the “name of the Lord” and a few others things. But most importantly, we landed not on more teaching about prayer, or about how to pray. We landed on whether or not we trust in prayer.

Because the truth is, if we know all about it, and even if I challenge people to practice it – if we don’t trust in prayer and in God, it won’t make a difference. So I asked us all to consider this question, “Do you trust in prayer and God to use prayer”. In spite of all the questions, the suffering we see, all the legitimate doubts and difficulties – do you trust in prayer?

Because I believe that prayer is worth trusting in. I believe that prayer actually changes the world. I believe that even in spite of the doubts I have at times, like anyone, that prayer matters.

So we ended with a challenge to prayer, and then ended the service with the only way that seemed appropriate. We invited people forward for prayer. And today if you are struggling in any way, I think today is the day to invite people in your life to pray. Because prayer matters, and prayer changes lives.

Sermon Notes:

Big Idea: Pray. Pray. Pray.

Teaching Points:

No profound theologian, James’ genius lies in his profound moral earnestness; in his powerfully simple call for repentance for action, and for a consistent Christian lifestyle. Douglass Moo
Wherever we are at in life prayer is to be part of our life.
Sickness has a way of separating us.
Oil was medicinal and a symbol of the Holy Spirit and God’s consecrating.
To pray in the name of the Lord is to pray and act as his representative and in his authority.
Do you trust in prayer?
It is God who is the healer.
Pray. Pray. Pray.

Adult Discussion Questions:

What stuck out to you from the sermon? What was challenging to you? What was new? What is your view of prayer? When have you seen a prayer answered? What are your questions concerning prayer? Who do you know that needs prayer and support? Who can you confess your sins to? Are you willing to?

Discussion Questions for Young Families

Talk to your kids today about the power of prayer. Ask them what they think prayer is? Ask them who they should be praying for – and then spend time in prayer with them.

Challenge for the Week: To trust in the power of prayer.

Sermon Preview

Prayer and Revival

On Sunday we are going to talk about prayer. Prayer is something that is really important and should be part of the regular fabric of our lives. Prayer is something that really releases God to work in the world and in our lives.

So on Sunday I am going to teach on prayer, but more importantly we are going to have a chance to practice prayer. We are going to have a time to actually pray for another. We are going to have a time to anoint people with oil, because I believe that prayer can heal. Prayer can change lives. So that’s where we are going on Sunday. We are going to be looking at this passage:

Are any of you suffering hardships? You should pray. Are any of you happy? You should sing praises. Are any of you sick? You should call for the elders of the church to come and pray over you, anointing you with oil in the name of the Lord. Such a prayer offered in faith will heal the sick, and the Lord will make you well. And if you have committed any sins, you will be forgiven. Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results. Elijah was as human as we are, and yet when he prayed earnestly that no rain would fall, none fell for three and a half years! Then, when he prayed again, the sky sent down rain and the earth began to yield its crops.

Hope you can join us.

Podcasts, Sermon Reflections

Finding God on Your iPod: The National and Learning to Lament

On Sunday we looked a song by one of my favourite bands called “The National”. And the song we explored was called “Sorrow”.

The reason we looked at this song was because this was the song that I played on repeat again and again when my dad passed away. It was a song that for me got tied to that dark and difficult time. The singer sings, “I don’t want to get over you” and that was so very true in my life.

He also sings, “Sorrow waited, and sorrow won”. And that was also true in my life; sorrow seemed to be winning.

And that’s really what we wanted to explore on Sunday, how do you move past sorrow? How do you overcome sorrow that grips you? How do you move forward?

And the answer is found in something called the lament.

The lament is really a type of prayer. A brutally honest, bring up the raw stuff within, kind of a prayer. Lament, if it’s about anything, is about honesty. But rather than discuss what it is, we looked at an example of lament in Psalm 39.

Psalm 39 is where David wrestles with maintaining silence before God, and expressing his hurt, anger, and accusation at God. David begins with maintaining silence, in fear that he might sin in what he says (v 1). But this doesn’t last for long because silence can’t last forever. And instead, out comes a torrent of expectations, longings, and hurt.

Listen to some of the raw stuff he says,

Rescue me from my rebellion. Do not let fools mock me. I am silent before you; I won’t say a word, for my punishment is from you. But please stop striking me! I am exhausted by the blows from your hand. (v. 7-9)

Leave me alone so I can smile again before I am gone and exist no more.

These are some brutally honest lines. David accuses God of punishing him, ignoring him, or not rescuing him when he should. And he ends with this line, that if God doesn’t help, at least leave him alone so that he can smile again. Being left alone by God is better than being rejected and punished by God. Or so David thinks.

Now do I believe that God is the one punishing David, or that God “strikes people”? No. But that’s not the point. The point is that David brings all that he feels, right or wrong, and brings it openly and brutally honestly before God. David’s reaction isn’t to avoid God, but to bring his accusation towards God. And this in itself is an act of faith, and hope. That even in bringing his desperation, hurt, and anger that God might hear and act.

This is lament. Being brutally honest with yourself and with God about what you feel and where you are at.

And this is what we need to learn. We do not lament. We hide, we paper over pain, we bury pain. We do not address pain and loss. But the truth is that if we want to learn to ever heal or move forward in sorrow, we need to learn to lament. We need to learn to be brutally honest with God and ourselves. And this is something that not only does the Bible authorize, but suggests. One third of the Psalms are complaints, laments, or Psalms of disorientation. Their very existence says that we can come to God with all that’s within us.

So we ended with the main point on Sunday, that we need to learn to lament. And for some of us this might take some really practical points. We might need to journal and let the hurt out. We might need to let a song speak for us (like “Sorrow” which is a modern day lament). We might need to lament with others either in a structured group, or with close friends. Or the best way is maybe to just read the Psalms and let them express our feelings to God.

The point is that if sorrow, grief, or difficulty ever grip and grab you, the way out isn’t to pretend it’s not there. The way out begins with one step. It begins with lament. And life and healing might be a long way off, but lament is the step that begins a journey. And it’s one we need to be okay to take.

Sermon Notes:

Big Idea: We need to learn to lament.

Teaching Points:

You are never ready for grief.
“I don’t want to get over you” – The National
Lament, if it is about anything, is about honesty.
David brings what he feels, not just what he knows, to God.
Within lament, even when you accuse God, You are still hoping in God.
To the extent we have not learned to lament, we deal superficially with the world’s brokenness, offering quick and easy fixes that do not require our conversion. Chris Rice, Emmanuel Katongole
We need to learn to lament.
Learning to lament has helped me find healing.
Lamenting can be journaling, sharing with others, having a song express your heart, or reading Psalms to lament.
We all take each other too much for granted. The routines of life distract us; our own pursuits make us oblivious; our anxieties and sorrows, unmindful. The beauties of the familiar go unremarked. We do not treasure each other enough. Nicholas Wolterstorff
I have been . . . grievously wounded. So I shall look at the world through tears. Perhaps I shall see things that dry-eyed I could not see. Nicholas Wolterstorff

Adult Discussion Questions:

What stuck out to you from the sermon? What was challenging to you? How did God speak to you through it? What was new? Was it awkward for you to talk about grief and sorrow? Have you ever experienced sorrow? What was it like for you? Have you ever “lamented”? What might lament look like in your life?

Discussion Questions for Young Families

Today let your kids teach you. Ask them what they do when they are hurt, and angry, and in sorrow. Kids are much more open and we can learn from them.

Challenge for the Week: Learn and practice the art of lament.

Sermon Reflections

Journeying Together is Healing

On Sunday we looked at the story of Ruth, and the power of committing to someone’s journey. The book of Ruth begins with Naomi her mother-in-law in a deeply dark place. She moves to a foreign country, and her husband and her two sons die. This leaves her alone in a foreign land, without support, without care, and with two foreign daughters-in-law.

She is hurt, spiteful towards God, and bitterness oozes out from her. She decides to journey back home. She is so bitter that when she arrives home and people say, “Is that Naomi” (which means pleasant in Hebrew)? She responds with, “No, call me Mara now” (which means bitter). So she has gone from being pleasant to bitter. She now totally identifies with loss, bitterness, and hurt as her companions. She says God sent her away full and brought her back empty.

This is the hard place that she is in. Yet in the midst of this difficult, and this Plan B, things change for her. Things change for Naomi because of her daughter-in-law Ruth.

Ruth commits to being with Naomi no matter what. Naomi seeks to push Ruth away, to say she can’t be helped, to say there is nothing that can be done (Ruth 1:11-13). But Ruth refuses to give up on Naomi. She commits to her that she will be with her no matter what. She says “Where you go, I’ll go, where you live I’ll live, your God will be my God. We will be together”.

And it is this commitment to journeying together that begins to change not only Naomi but also Ruth. Through a series of amazing events, God begins to restore to Naomi some of what she has lost. God begins to heal her. And this only happens though because Ruth committed to journeying with Naomi for the long haul.

The story ends with Naomi being happy and full of joy as she cuddles with Ruth’s new baby, her grandson. Her life moves from Plan B back to God’s promises.

From this story we landed on the main idea that we need each other. Not in the clichéd, hallmark, or sentimental way. But in a real – deep life – can’t get through life without one another. I need you, you need me, we need each other.

So we ended with a challenge. That for some of us we need to go be a “Ruth” to someone else. We need to commit to journey with them, to care for them, and to love them like Ruth did. And while we can’t be a Ruth to everyone in need, that is not an excuse not to be there for someone in need. That was our challenge.

We also challenged those of us who are in Naomi’s place to reach out to a “Ruth”. To not refuse the help that a “Ruth” can bring. To not push away that relationship.

Because the truth is the only way we get through life is with one another. This is the beautiful thing about the church ~ Naomi’s and Ruth’s commit to journeying together and both find a new hope in the process.

Teaching Notes

Big Idea: We need each other; we need to journey together.

Teaching Points:

Here’s the truth and this one is thoroughly biblical: throughout life you will face one situation after another that will be completely beyond what you can handle. Pete Wilson
We need one another to get through Plan B times.
Naomi means “Pleasant” in Hebrew; Mara means “Bitter”.
No longer are these emotions that afflict us, they are emotions that define us.
Ruth commits to journeying with Naomi.
People who are in a deep place of hurt often push away the only people who can help
When you are in Plan B, you need community more than ever. Yet because of the pain that comes along with Plan B, it’s easy to miss the God-given gift of community. Pete Wilson
We need one another.
“I will go where you go. I will live where you live.” Ruth
Just because you can’t help everyone does not give you an excuse to not help someone
We can’t benefit from the power of community until we dare to face who we are. Pete Wilson

Adult Discussion Questions:

What stuck out to you from the sermon? What was challenging to you? How did God speak to you through it? What was new?

Have you ever been like Naomi, so consumed by hurt, that it defines you? How did it happen? How did you move out of it? Have you ever had someone “be a Ruth to you”? What was that like? How did they commit to journeying with you? Why do you think it’s hard to be a “Ruth” to someone? Why do you think it’s hard to allow others to be a “Ruth” to us? Who is God calling you to jouney with? Is God asking you to allow someone to journey with you?

Discussion Question for Families:

Talk to your kids about the importance of caring for one another. Talk to them about how Ruth helped Naomi by being there for her. Ask your kids if there is anyone they know that needs someone to be there for them. Ask them about ideas for helping them, and then use their ideas.

Challenge for the Week: Be a Ruth to Someone; Invite a Ruth to Journey with You

Sermon Reflections

Broken Pasts, Limited Futures, and New Life

On Sunday we explored the story of Moses but looked at it from a different angle. We looked at it from a failed past angle. Moses was surely thought to be the man to bring salvation to his people. His story from the very beginning seems destined for greatness. He was miraculously saved in an ark, grows up in Pharaoh’s court, and seems to be a man of limitless potential whom God will use to save his people.

Fast forward to when he is older, and ready to step up and be the hero. The story in Exodus 2 jumps to his moment when we think he will save his people. But what ends up happening is that Moses makes a rash and impulsive decision and kills an Egyptian burying him in his sand. This leads to Moses fleeing from Egypt leaving behind his destiny to live in the desert.

It’s at this place that we catch up with Moses, a man whom we must assume has many regrets. He was raised in the lap of luxury, and is now a man alone watching sheep as a shepherd in the desert. My guess is that if we were to ask Moses what his future was like he would say dim. That he would assume that his past is limiting what God can do with him in the future. That even though he once had potential his failures define his future.

But what I love about God is that our past is never ever wasted with him. That our past never defines our future. Our God can even transform our pasts into new futures for us.

So God comes to Moses and says, “go to Pharaoh and speak to him and save your people.” This is amazing because Moses is probably the only Israelite person in the world who can actually get to Pharaoh. It’s like you or me trying to get a personal audience with the President of the United States – it’s just not going to happen. But Moses grew up in the court, Moses might have even grown up with the current Pharaoh, Moses knows the ins and outs of political landscape. He can get to see Pharaoh.

And so Moses thinks that his future must limit God, but God wants to use Moses precisely because of his past. His past doesn’t limit God, but actually allows God to do something amazing through him.

And I think this is true of all of us. Our pasts with God are never wasted, instead God can use them, transform them, and build on them to accomplish something amazing through us. Through Moses and his checkered past God saves all the Israelite people. And through us no matter what our past is like, God can use us as well.

The question is this: do you believe that God can use all of you?

Do you honestly believe God can use all of you?

Because this story points to the fact that your past doesn’t limit God. Your poor decisions, awful events, hurtful encounters doesn’t stop God. In fact, God can use your past to bring about a new future for you and for others.

So the question is “do you believe that God can use all of you, no matter what you’ve done? And if so are you willing to be used?”

We ended up on Sunday with the challenge for each of us to carve out some time and go to God and give him all of ourselves. To offer to him all of us, broken pasts and everything, and invite him to use us. I think it’s the right way to start. Moses encounters God in the burning bush and everything is changed. So today why not go and encounter God and discover that he can change and transform your past and your future. Because that is how great our God really is.

Sermon Notes:

Big Idea: Your past is never wasted

Take Aways…

We don’t drift into making a difference
One of the single biggest obstacles to finding God’s future is often our past
We have an assumption that God works best with perfect people
Moses is gifted with amazing potential
In Moses we see someone with unlimited potential, falter and fail
We end up rehearsing and regretting our failed decisions
For many of us decisions in the past decide and determine our future
Our God can change the past
We often feel like our past limits God’s future for us
God chooses Moses because of his past, not in spite of it
Your past is never wasted
Will your story be one of regret or transformation?
Do you believe God can use all of you?
Give God all of yourself

Adult / Group Discussion Questions:

What stuck out to you from the sermon? What was challenging to you? How did God speak to you through it?

Have you ever deeply regretted a decision? What happened? How come you regretted it? Have you ever felt like you were destined to do something important? In the sermon could you relate at all to Moses regretting an impulsive decision?

What in your past have you wished you could let go of? How might God be wanting to redeem and use your past for his good? How might God want to transform your past, so that you might transform others today?

Do you believe God can use all of you? Share your thoughts on this question.

Plan a time to spend with God giving him all of your past

Discussion Questions for Young Families: Take sometime to talk with your kids about how with God he heals our past. Ask your kids if there has ever been a choice they regret or something that really hurt them. Talk to them about how with God he can heal our hurt pasts. Talk to them about how we can go to God with all we have in us and find peace. Spend some time with your kids praying, and bringing to God anything they have.

Challenge for this Week: Give God all of Yourself

Sermon Preview

Learning to Leave the Desert

How do you leave the desert?

I mean honestly. When your life is feeling dry, distant, and you feel alone – how do you leave that place? When you feel like you are wandering around in circles, when life has passed you by, when you look back and regret decisions wondering – how did I end up here? How do you leave “here”? How do you find a place with life, hope and grace? How do you leave the desert?

I don’t know if you’ve been there but I have. I have been in a place that once was good but got drained of life and was draining me. I have been in a place where all of a sudden I felt alone, distant from God, and wondering where I was. I have been in a desert staring at the empty world around me wondering how I will ever find my way out. And maybe you’ve been there too. It is a difficult place to be. The trouble is that life seems to take us to the desert.

The question is how do we leave? How do we find new life again? How do we find hope again? How do we find a land flowing with milk and honey?

That’s what we are exploring on Sunday how to leave the desert and find new life. We are going to be exploring a pretty well known passage with some pretty not-so-well-known conclusions.

Come Sunday we’ll explore how to find your way out, which not so surprisingly, begins with God finding you.

But that’s Sunday, what about today? What if your desert is so difficult, and oppressive that you can’t wait till Sunday to start leaving it?

Well I’ll give you a hint of where we are going on Sunday. It doesn’t begin with you. It doesn’t begin with you forcing or finding your way out. It begins with God finding you and leading you out.

So today why not make yourself easy to find. Why not take some actual time, sit in space with God, ask him to direct, and to wait on him. Give him time to speak to you, give him your attention, and wait patiently on him. This, of course, isn’t easy, but it’s a lot easier than languishing in the desert.

So come Sunday we’ll explore how to find your way out in more depth, but it does begin with God. So no matter how your life has been these past few weeks, days, or even years why not let yourself be found by God. Don’t fill your weekend so full of noise, business, and stuff that he can’t break through to you. Sit still, stop, and listen. And who knows maybe God will show up in a burning bush and lead you out…

Personal Musings, Theological Musings

The God of Limits

Usually we think of God as unlimited in everything. And in a traditional sense I think this is true and good. That his love is limitless, that his power is vast, and his forgiveness faithful and overflowing.

The trouble is that we forget that Jesus had limits, so we forget or pretend that we don’t have limits. The point is that if the Son of God had limits and created healthy boundaries on earth so should we as his followers. I know that it might seem weird to think of Jesus having limits, but that’s what the Gospels seem to point to. Jesus didn’t heal everyone there was. Jesus didn’t convince and save everyone around him. Jesus wasn’t able to change everyone. Jesus got tired. Jesus retreated. Jesus got frustrated with the disciples. Jesus had limits and he knew it.

The problem is that Christians, and pastors especially, forget that we have natural limits. We forget that we can’t save everyone, and having healthy boundaries isn’t a bad thing, it’s a necessary thing. The problem is that we believe it is our “mission” to change the world and save as many as possible, even at the expense of our families, friends, and personal health. The problem with that is twofold: first it’s not our mission, it’s God’s; second not respecting our natural limits and boundaries doesn’t follow Jesus’ example. Jesus got tired and retreated. Jesus provided for his family. Jesus as a human being had limits because all of humanity has limits. This is not a bad thing, in fact it is a wonderful thing. The limitless God above, wants to use us even with our limits, but we must recognize that we each have limits. I can’t meet with everyone. I can’t save everyone. I can’t give to everyone. Sometimes I have to say no. Sometimes I need to not check my emails. Sometimes I need to trust that God can handle things without me for a while.

Parker Palmer writes, “Self-care is never a selfish act – it is simply stewardship of the only gift I have, the gift I was put on earth to offer to others. Anytime we can listen to our true self and give it the care it requires, we do so not only for ourselves, but for the many others who lives we touch.”

I think he’s right, because that truth flows from the life of Jesus. Jesus didn’t run himself ragged, burnout, and falter because he took care of himself so he could accomplish something greater than himself. That’s our calling too. To take care of ourselves so we can accomplish something greater than ourselves.

So today take care of yourself, in ways that make sense for you: rest, pray, play, take a walk, read, cook a good meal, say no to something. Become aware of limits, and don’t worry about overcoming them, trust in God to work within them.

Personal Musings

Transforming not Transmitting Pain

I have one last quote to share before I move back to my regular blogging schedule and thoughts, now that I’m back from vacations. So here it is for a Monday morning.

“If you do not transform your pain, you will surely transmit it to those around you and even to the next generation. Suffering, of course, can lead you in either of two directions: It can make you very bitter and close you down, or it can make you wise, compassionate, and utterly open.” – Richard Rohr

The reality is we suffer. Life has struggles, ups and downs. But this quote reminds me it’s what I do in the struggles that counts. That’s why I like this quote, because it reminds me that what I’m going through doesn’t define me, my choices in the struggles define me.

So I like this quote because it reminds me that even out of bad things, God can bring something good…